Is This Your King? Yes . He. Is! – Michael B. Jordan on Chadwick Boseman

Colon cancer. Does the English language contain two worse words?

I suffer from hemorrhoids. Every year, I have to give a stool sample to confirm the blood in my stool result from hemorrhoids not colon cancer. Waiting for the results is always nerve-racking. I am confident the tests will always come back negative, but the thought of having cancer petrifies me. My son already experienced enough loss in his life. He does not need to lose me as well.

This month, colon cancer claimed the lives of two individuals I admired from a far.

First, we lost Jamie Samuelsen, a local sports radio talk show. Unbelievably, I listened to Jamie over half of both of our lives. Jamie was born less than three months before me. Automatically, I felt a connection. In addition, his sport takes combined thought, reason and logic instead of the hot takes made famous by Stephen A. Smith and lesser talented talking heads. If I were a sports talk show host, I would be like Jamie: measured, even-keeled and judicious.

In January 2019, a doctor diagnosed Jamie with Stage IV Colon Cancer. He survived another 18 months including playing a three set tennis match a few weeks prior to his death. Sadly, his health deteriorated quickly, and he died less than a month after his tennis match.

Next, we lost Chadwick Boseman, The Black Panther. Zion and I love The Black Panther. Chadwick portrayed The Black Panther with soul, cool, grace, intelligence and toughness. The epitome of Blackness. He brought the same qualities to other characters he played like James Brown, Thurgood Marshall and Jackie Robinson.

Similar to Jamie, Chadwick kept his diagnosis secret. Unbelievably, the doctor diagnosed his cancer in 2016, and he kept it secret for four years and 10 movies. He finally succumbed this past Friday.

Whenever I feel like “cancer cannot happen to me” or “I can push that colonoscopy off to next year”, I will think of Jamie and Chadwick. Their strength. Their courage. Their quiet fights. Most of all, I will think of how much they would want me to take Colon Cancer seriously. I will never forget this lesson.

Last weekend, I went bike riding with Zion when I noticed a strange sight. A bald spot the size of a nickel. Not on myself but on the nine-year old, Zion. Naturally, I googled “child hair loss” and “bald spots on children” while biking. Does he have a scalp infection or an autoimmune disease? A couple of nights later, I got my answer.

I walked into my bedroom and saw a pair of scissors on my dresser. Surrounding the scissors were hair clippings. Zion cut his hair. This took me back to the seventh grade when classmates teased and bullied me because of my unkempt hair. Trying to quiet the teasing, I found a pair of electric clippers in my mother’s bathroom and went to work.

Nowadays, the natural look is much more common, and this was Zion’s style. I assumed he liked his hair. Unfortunately, I never brushed, combed or styled it. I want to pick his hair, but he always lets out a blood-curdling howl when the pick catches one of his knapps. I stopped trying altogether. I should have kept trying.

After his latest work, Zion had a nike symbol size bald spot in his hair, and I treated him exactly the same way my parents treated me 35 years ago: a trip to the barber shop. The exact same barber shop. Zion got a low cut fade with a “Z” shaved into his hair. The same cut he received many times in the past. Back in the eighties, I got most of my hair cut off. Not quite as low as Zion but enough to stop the teasing and bullying.

In a couple of years (if not sooner), I will no longer have any say in Zion’s hairstyles. I kind of hopes he picks a natural style. It suits him and distinguishes him from me. If further wants to distinguish himself from me, he needs to stay away from scissors and clippers. As long as he does not have any nickel bald spots or nike symbols in his hair, he’ll be accepted warmly by his classmates.

When I lost my mother in 2016, I lost a lot. I lost my teacher, mentor, spiritual guide, conscious, biggest supporter and…best babysitter. She was my go-to babysitter for her grandson, Zion. She was thrilled to babysit her grandson. Five months after holding her first grandson, she died suddenly and unexpectedly. I had a monumental child care void to fill. In walked, Danielle and Ana.

A friend of Danielle referred her to us shortly after my mom’s death. She was sixteen when she started. The first time she babysat, she locked Zion and herself out of the house. I was half way to a concert when she called to inform me. Not the best very impression, but she clearly cared about doing a good job. She stuck around for her senior year, first three years of college, different majors and different part-time jobs. This spring when I needed her most, she came through big time. Due to COVID, Zion was home with me, and I needed help during the day balancing our two schedules. She worked two or three days a week from March through the end of the school year in June. She was an absolute godsend keeping our household together. Now, she is off to finish her college studies in Colorado as Zion begins the school year remotely. God, please send me another Danielle…

Soon after Danielle joined our family, we connected with Ana on care.com. Ana was the perfect person at the perfect time. Ana is an experienced nanny so spending three hours on a Sunday afternoon with a five-year old boy was not going to phase her. For those three hours, she ran the household liked she lived here. She was my go-to babysitter for the past four years. Toastmaster meetings, date nights, concerts, Michigan football games, picking Zion up from soccer lessons and mostly Sunday afternoons when I needed a break, she was always there. When the Board of Education approved my application to become the Chief Financial and Operating Officer for Southfield Public Schools, she was the first person I told because she was, naturally, babysitting. Now, she is getting married in September and pursing her CPA.

Ana left us with a thought about how life is about change. Yes, it is. Sometimes, change hurts. Nevertheless, we will survive.

To Danielle and Ana, thank you for becoming members of our extended family and all the best life has to offer.

Talk less, smile more. These are lyrics from the song “Aaron Burr, Sir” in the musical Hamilton. I absolutely love Hamilton. Last month, when it came to Disney+, I watched the movie twice the during the first day. My son, Zion, watched with me during the second viewing. Naturally, I was singing, having a good time and in pure bliss. Right out of the blue, Zion looked up with an astonished look on his face said “Dad, you’re smiling!”

Mister Toastmaster. My fellow Toastmasters. Honored guests. Zion is a lot of things. A soccer player, wannabe dragon slayer, Nintendo gamer and most importantly, truth sayer. Zion is the king of uncomfortable truths, which he always gives in a blunt yet innocent way. Last month, in his blunt yet innocent way, he informed let me know I do not smile very often.

Do you know how much it stings when your child says you do not smile enough? I was surprised. Look, I will never be the life of the party or be happy go lucky as Bluto Blutarsky. However, I smile from time to time. Every pay day, every solar eclipse and every time the Lions win a Super Bowl, I have a HUGE smile on my face. Am I smiling the in between those times? Maybe, not as much as I thought. At least not around Zion.

For those unaware, I am a single parent. Being a single parent is not easy. Around Zion, I am cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, helping him with homework, getting him ready for school or bed. The smiles are usually few and far between. I am doing what I need to do to keep him safe and healthy. Most days, I am not mad or sad when doing these tasks. More matter of fact. However, a nine-year old boy is subject to interpret things differently. Unfortunately, Zion might interpret the look on my face as sad or mad.

How do you smile more? The last thing you want is your child being more excited about seeing a smile than he is on Christmas Day. Is it a matter of spending more time playing Nintendo, slaying imaginary dragons and kicking a soccer ball? Is it watching Hamilton every day? Whatever the solution is, I need to find it.

If I’m going to wait for a Lions Super Bowl to start smiling, Zion is going to have a sad childhood. That’s the last thing I want for him. I need to start finding the fun in life and giving Zion the happy household he deserves. I’ll leave you with this thought Talk Less Smile More. Find the fun in life. You and the ones you love and love you will benefit.

Daily Soundtrack: Black Is King by Beyonce

The U.S. Navy’s first Black female tactical air (TACAIR) pilot received her Wings of Gold on Saturday, July 31, 2020, marking a significant milestone for Naval Aviation.

Lt. j.g. Madeline G. Swegle was designated a naval aviator and received her Wings of Gold with 25 classmates during a small ceremony at Naval Air Station (NAS) Kingsville, Texas.

I was surprised to learn Lt. Swegle is the first female black fighter pilot. I assumed someone beaten her to it. Bessie Coleman was the first African American female pilot to get her license in 1921, and it is hard to believe it took almost 100 years for the first female fighter pilot.

This is more of a reflection of society and lack of opportunity than lack of want. Lt. Swegle is not the first black female to want to defend our country from the air. Unfortunately, without the opportunity or the pioneer to break the glass ceiling, these black females went into other professions leaving America’s tactical air defense to others.

Now, the glass ceiling is broken. Lt. Swegle is first but will not be the last black female tactical air fighter. America’s fighter pilots are about to become a more diverse and inclusive group, and we all benefit.

Thank you, Bessie Coleman and thank you, Lt. Swegle.

Daily Soundtrack: NBA on ESPN Theme

Sports is my constant companion. As an extreme introvert, I do not have many companions, but sports is one. Since I was six everywhere I went, sports was nearby.

NCAA Basketball’s March Madness is my favorite event of the year, bar none. Saturday nights were alright for watching fighting on Hockey Night in Canada. Sitting in the old Tiger Stadium or Comerica Park on a warm summer night is heavenly. Walking into Michigan Stadium and just breathing in the air is life-affirming.

Sports was always next to me until March 11. On this day, it was announced Utah Jazz center Rudy Gobert contracted COVID-19. Soon after, all sports shut down. March Madness was canceled. No more Saturday Nights with Hockey Night in Canada. Major League Baseball suspended the season. Chances are miniscule I’ll be walking into Michigan Stadium this fall.

However, I survived without sports during the COVID shutdown. The threat of a novel coronavirus shifted my focus elsewhere. Sports took a backseat to keeping my son up to date with his virtual learning, doing my job remotely and keeping us safe and healthy. Outside of watching one set of a socially distant women’s tennis match, I went without sports for four months. Sports was no longer my constant companion.

Then, baseball returned last week, and I quickly remembered how much I enjoy watching baseball on weekend afternoons while lying on the couch.

On Thursday, the NBA resumed their season, and I made it a point to be front of the television for as much of the first game (featuring Gobert’s Jazz) as possible.

Yesterday, Hockey Night in Canada returned. Of course, I watched and flipped back and forth with yesterday’s NBA games.

Football training camps are beginning. I’m mentally starting to prepare for football fantasy drafts like I do every August.

Nevertheless, COVID-19 might shut down the baseball season. The NFL could meet the same fate without playing the season in a self-contained bubble like the NBA and NHL. This upcoming college football season is nothing more than a money grab and is not in the best long-term interest of the 99% of the players whom will not play professional football. Yet, I’ll watch college football, the NFL and the MLB as long as they are playing. I’m still a die hard fan.

I missed sports, but I do not need sports. Life has other priorities especially keeping my family safe and healthy during the COVID age. So, I’ll deal with life’s priorities, but I’m going to find some time for sports. It’s great to have my constant companion back home.

What would have happened if we never have the Talk? The Talk is as old as time. It is the moment when an important piece of knowledge is transferred from father to son. It’s a father’s duty to have the Talk with his son when the young man comes of age.

As a father of a nine-year old boy, I’m not looking forward to the Talk. I’m not sure how to broach the subject. Do I bring it up over dinner? Do I take him out for ice cream? Do we discuss it one night before going to bed? If I find the place and time, I will need to summon every last piece of courage in my body to discuss such an uncomfortable subject. I’ll long for the days when our discussions centered
on such important matters such as: who’s faster The Flash or Sonic The Hedgehog?

Nevertheless, I cannot put it off too much longer. Zion is growing up quickly right in front of my eyes, and I owe it to him to have the Talk. If I do not, he is going to be unprepared as he grows into a strong young man. Or he is going to hear about it from one of his friends. Worse yet, he is going to have a trial by fire.

Let’s imagine its June 18, 2027. In a world without social distancing, face masks and being greeted by contact less thermometers every time you walked into a store. Zion is 16 and out on a date with, in my not so humble opinion, a very lucky young lady. Zion is in driver’s seat, and his date is loving life in the passenger seat.
They are two kids enjoying the end of school, the sun, being sixteen and the freedom that comes with youth.

Then quicker than either the Flash or Sonic the Hedgehog, Zion puts his hand on the young lady’s thigh. The young lady responds in kind by placing her hand on his leg. They look into each other’s eyes with a primal intensity. They know exactly what each other is feeling. Right when things are about to boil over…., the sound of a police siren throws cold water over the date.

Zion pulls over followed closely by the police car. In his car, the officer takes a deep breath, says something into his radio and slowly get out of his car.

How does the officer react? He pulled over a young black teenager going the flow of traffic. Is he planning on giving Zion a warning? Is he planning to tell Zion he has a headlight out? Does he view Zion as a harmless teenager or a strong threatening black male? Is he mentally preparing for a fight? Has he already made up his mind Zion is an animal and should be treated as such?

Most importantly, how does Zion react? Is he polite and respectful when stopped by the police? Does he keep both hands on the wheel? Does he view the officer as a friend or a threat to his life? Is he mentally preparing for a fight? Has he made his mind up this is a bad cop looking to hurt me?

How will Zion know to act when approached by a police officer if we never have the Talk? What would have if we never have the Talk?

My work ethic is one of the strongest and proudest characteristics. Any success, I have or will have will be directly attributable to my work ethic. Worker bee is an apt title for me. Unfortunately, worker bees do not make effective Chief Financial and Operations Officers.

In my previous position as a Deputy Executive Director, I was doing the work of analyst instead of a Deputy Executive Director. I was creating spreadsheets, doing budgets and preparing financial analysis. I was still a worker bee when I should have been the beekeeper. Part of it was just dealing with the day-to-day fires associated with any position. Part of it was me just refusing to let go.

Now, in order to be an effective CFOO, I need to let go. I have to long-range plan, review and develop processes and help create a long term structure at Southfield Public Schools. Luckily, I have a wonderful Director of Finance to take most of the day-to-day financial duties away from me. She has made the transition from worker bee to beekeeper much easier. With someone less capable in her role, I still would be putting my worker bee hat frequently to make sure the financial operations were running smoothly.

It is probably safe to say I still have not completely let go of being the worker bee. I still miss the analysis and spreadsheets (I have an abnormal love of spreadsheets), but Southfield Public Schools needs a CFOO not a financial analyst.

Every day, I’m trying to let go of the worker bee mentality a little more and becoming the best beepkeeper I can. It is going to be a long journey with a lot of spreadsheets and urgent financial requests along the bumpy road, but I’ll get to my destination in time.

As part of my interview process for my new job as the Chief Financial and Operations Officer for Southfield Public Schools, I completed a first 90 Days Plan. Today is Day 90. For this blog, I’m going to look back on my 90 Day Plan and evaluate where I am.

Learning Goals:

• Schedule introductory meetings with the Superintendent and the rest of the Superintendent’s Cabinet to learn how I can help make their lives easier. DONE
• Schedule introductory meetings with my direct reports to hear their perspectives and determine how I can best help them succeed and grow in their roles. DONE
• Schedule introductory meeting with finance and operations staff members to gather their thoughts and learn about SPS from the people on the front line. I meet with all of the members of the finance staff regularly. On the operations side, I have only met with the Operations Director. I should schedule time with his Administrative Assistant and Assistant Director.
• Schedule an introductory meeting with the Board Treasurer to gain the Board’s perspective. The Superintendent requested all conversations with the Board go through her.
• Spend team with Academics and Intense Student Support to learn more about their challenges, needs and funding issues. DONE
• Spend team with Human Resources to learn about SPS’ Position Management. This is completed. I should acknowledge the Director of Finance Operations has a much better handle of Position Management than I do, which is fine.
• Review the 2018-2019 Comprehensive Annual Financial Report DONE
• Review the 2019-2020 Adopted Budget, fall student count and year-to-date expenditures. DONE
• Review financial data for the past five to seven years We only have two years of data in our new financial system. I reviewed recent audits to gain some idea. We’ll say DONE.
• Devote large blocks of time to the operations staff to familiarize myself with their daily processes. No, but I learned I need to manage at a macro level rather than being involved at a day-to-day level.
• Sign up for MSBO Chief Financial Officer Certification Program DONE
• Implement plans to address audit findings. DONE
• Discuss the current budget process with the Superintendent to determine her desired budget process. DONE
• Bring my discussion notes from with the Superintendent back to the financial team and begin modifying the budget process to meet Dr. Green’s vision. The Director of Finance Services and I know the desired process (Zero Based Budgeting). The process needs to be developed.
• Review processes and procedures to identify areas where SPS could be at the forefront of possible innovation. We are attempting to become more digital and automated. However, it feels like we are more trying to catch up with other districts rather than be at the forefront.

Performance Goals:

• Develop plans to address and correct all audit findings by the end of my first 30 days. DONE
• Submit all necessary monthly financial reports accurately and timely. DONE
• Prepare a budget amendment if necessary, based upon fall count, material budget assumption modifications or year-to-date budget variances. DONE
• Have a finished draft budget development process for Dr. Green’s review. NOT DONE. This is at the top of the to-do list.
• Implementation of the new budget development process. SEE PRECEDING
• Formation of a cross-functional team to address at least one area of opportunity. Cross-functional teams meet regularly to discuss existing issues rather than addressing areas of opportunities.

I accomplished more of my goals than I thought. This exercise was not quite as painful as I thought it was going to be.

On the other hand, we need to finalize the Budget Development Process, and we will in the next couple of weeks. Budget is my specialty and strength. I’m excited about the process we are going to develop.

Furthermore, I’m hoping to make Key Performance Indicators more apart of the Business Office’s daily routines. This is something to shoot for over the next 90 days.

In addition over the next 90 days, I’m hoping we continue to modernize our processes, and, if an opportunity presents itself, we become innovators and ahead the curve in some area.

Overall, I’m grateful for this opportunity, learned a lot and met a lot of wonderful people along the way. The next 90 days are going to be even better.

When the Beastie Boys released Paul’s Boutique in 1989, I did not get it. I was expecting Licensed to Ill Part II. Where were the hard rock samples? The highly anticipated frat boy lyrics were replaced Brady Bunch, Flintstones and NOVA references. I listened to it once and put it away with no inclination to play it again.

However, I could not completely stay away. Every listen brought something new: a Mountain sample here and a Daniel 3:12 reference there. With each listen, I learn something new. This blog is also intended to serve as a constant learning experience for me. As a result, the name of this blog is Marc Jason’s Boutique.

I’m going to use this blog to reflect upon an important lesson learned and think about how to apply the lesson to my life going forward.

The first lesson relates to another white rapper, Eminem. I absolutely love the song “Lose Yourself.” It is my go-to song when I need to get pumped up and especially when I’m getting ready for an interview or an important meeting.

This week, I took a Leadership Development class at the University of Michigan Ross Business School Executive Education. On the final day, we discussed two different mindsets regarding potential leadership opportunities.

The first mindset is Learning-Growth where you try to find a learning or growth opportunity in each experience.

The second mindset is Performance – Prove or Performance – Avoid. This mindset involves proving yourself to others or avoiding situations where you might fail. “Lose Yourself” enhances this mindset.

“Lose Yourself” is about a struggling rapper believing he has one shot at fame. For him, winning the rap battle was life or death.

All the pain inside amplified by the
Fact that I can’t get by with my nine to
Five and I can’t provide the right type of
Life for my family ’cause man, these ******* food stamps don’t buy diapers
And its no movie, there’s no Mekhi Phifer
This is my life and these times are so hard
And it’s getting even harder tryin’ to feed and water my seed, plus
See dishonor caught up between bein’ a father and a prima-donna
Baby mama drama screamin’ on and too much
For me to want to say in one spot, another jam or not
Has gotten me to the point, I’m like a snail I’ve got
To formulate a plot fore I end up in jail or shot
Success is my only ************** option, failures not
Mom, I love you, but this trail has got to go, I cannot grow old in Salem’s lot
So here I go is my shot
Feet fail me not ’cause maybe the only opportunity that I got

A job interview or business meeting is not life or death. I need to stop putting so much pressure on myself to succeed. I need to take a step back, appreciate the opportunity and learn. I will be a better person in the long run with much less stress.

Unlike Paul’s Boutique in 1989, I have every inclination to keep “Lose Yourself” in heavy rotation. I will just save it for before workouts and car rides…after job interviews.